Awkwardlyme

The Pedicure kit and the unrequited love interest!!

I'm continuing where I left off, with an update on the romcom story I tried to develop from our office celebration. The hallway greetings, occasional Instagram interactions, and random small talks continued. Then, I found out that my commanding crush is serving his notice period and will be permanently leaving the organization – and my reach. But this isn't a bad sign! My biggest worry about approaching him directly was the potential impact on my career and the possible embarrassing encounters if he shot me down. However, once he leaves the organization, who would care?

“I decided to ask him out a month after he left the job and had been waiting for the day with curiosity and nervousness. Eventually, the day arrived! Coincidentally, his last day coincided with a workplace celebration, and everyone bid farewell to him, but I never got to say goodbye. Instead, I opted for a text conversation and reached out. Surprisingly, he revealed that he had searched for me but couldn't find me! That moment sparked excitement, and I hyped myself, 'You got moves, girl!' Feeling motivated, I opened up about my feelings, expressing my desire to meet him and get to know him better. I asked if we could meet and see if we click.

“He appriciated my intrest but politely declined since isn't in the right emotional place for a romantic relationship. I respected his decision and understood his perspective , we agreed to catch up as friends sometimes. After all, not all real connections need to be romantic, right? I'm looking forward to getting to know him better in a friendly capacity.

The Pedicure kit and the unrequited love interest!!

I'm continuing where I left off, with an update on the romcom story I tried to develop from our office celebration. The hallway greetings, occasional Instagram interactions, and random small talks continued. Then, I found out that my commanding crush is serving his notice period and will be permanently leaving the organization – and my reach. But this isn't a bad sign! My biggest worry about approaching him directly was the potential impact on my career and the possible embarrassing encounters if he shot me down. However, once he leaves the organization, who would care?

“I decided to ask him out a month after he left the job and had been waiting for the day with curiosity and nervousness. Eventually, the day arrived! Coincidentally, his last day coincided with a workplace celebration, and everyone bid farewell to him, but I never got to say goodbye. Instead, I opted for a text conversation and reached out. Surprisingly, he revealed that he had searched for me but couldn't find me! That moment sparked excitement, and I hyped myself, 'You got moves, girl!' Feeling motivated, I opened up about my feelings, expressing my desire to meet him and get to know him better. I asked if we could meet and see if we click.

“He appriciated my intrest but politely declined since isn't in the right emotional place for a romantic relationship. I respected his decision and understood his perspective , we agreed to catch up as friends sometimes. After all, not all real connections need to be romantic, right? I'm looking forward to getting to know him better in a friendly capacity.

Pedicure kit and the possible love interest!

Okay, stop judging me! Yeah, I have a thing for tall guys, and I mean really tall – 6'2 and above. Having made this confession, let me share my awkward attempts to connect with a tall colleague in my workplace. It all started when we were randomly paired up and played against each other in an office celebration. We both won a pedicure kit, which I'm pretty sure is actually a torture kit! My colleague jokingly mentioned that we made a great couple and that I should try talking to him. However, it never happened due to various reasons, including my attempts to save myself from an embarrassing encounter every time I ran into him in the office hallway. But the seed was planted.

Fast-forwarding to six months later, his topic came up again during our common rant about our poor work-life balance and crunching deadlines. Someone mentioned that he's actually a good leader who doesn't micromanage, stands up for his team, and is supportive. That peaqued my intrest and wanted to get to know him more.

In today's modern world, the first step is to send a follow request on Instagram, hoping to initiate a conversation. But, much to my surprise (or bad luck), this person doesn't have a digital presence. He does have an Instagram account with zero posts, which he uses to watch other people's stories – what's the point if it's not even used for that?!

I conveyed my interest to my closest friends, who have been motivating me ever since to talk to him. Unfortunately, we never crossed paths or had a chance to talk. And, obviously, the fact that we sat at opposite corners of the building didn't help. This led me to obsess over finding a way to talk to him without making things obvious, as I had no idea about the outcome.

One issue with liking someone at work is that we never know how it will affect our career, and I'm definitely not ready to test those waters.

Then, it hit me that he had posted about a vacancy in his team a few months back. If I could find someone from my friend circle interested in applying, it might lead to a conversation. A friend shared her boyfriend's resume to help with the conversation. And, finally, I pinged him on Instagram about the vacancy! We had a short and reasonable conversation, but it dried up within a day before turning into something meaningful. Still, I've broken the ice, and now every time we cross each other we exchange a smile and a simple hello. I still consider this a win , who knows what might happen someday?

Blown girl on a dating app- “The soul Diggers”

After the past 6 months of endless swiping with no romantic prospects I decided to rant about here because aren't we all evolved to turn our traumas into humor.

One of the most common encounters we all have on dating apps are that when You actually find someone attractive and them not wanting commit and looking for something casual. I know right – “The pain “.

But believe me that's not the worst part when you are using dating apps in India. Because most men here use Bumble/hinge to find companionship, a good friend for a lifetime and to fix them because apparently all of them fell in love with a heartless witch who shattered their heart. And when you tell them that this won't work for you, they say “I am not saying no to something serious, just not ready at the moment but eventually I will be ready”.

I sometimes wonder about the confidence these men have (I am trying to not be rude here but yeah, the right word is “Audacity”), to reach out to a stranger and except them to be give emotional support and the companionship when I still struggle to ask my change back from the auto anna who asked 20rs extra. I really do believe that's it's better that someone openly admit that they are looking for a causal relationship rather than not knowing what they want and expect a girl to come fix them and open their eyes to the whole new world.

Moral of the story- when someone tells you that they want something casual appreciate the honesty and move on. But when they say I am not sure we will talk and go with the flow – “Run Girly”

You know, how commonly women are referred to as gold diggers because they are looking for a man who possess money they don't have.

It's just got me think why there is no word out there for men who look for a lady who can compensate their inefficiency to process their old traumas and absence of emotional maturity. How about we call them “soul diggers”.

I still think seeking a partner with emotional maturity is a healthy expectation.

But when you lack self-awareness and expect it to be compensated by another person and requiring them to heal you is an issue.

Brown Girl on a Dating app!!

It's been a while since I have been here, talking about my lost love on bumble because of my wobbly clumsiness. After the past 6 months of endless swiping with no romantic prospects I decided to rant about here because aren't we all evolved to turn our traumas into humor. One of the most common encounters we all have on dating apps are that when You actually find someone attractive and them not wanting commit and looking for something casual.
I know right – “ The pain “.

But believe me that's not the worst part when you are using dating apps in the Indian subcontinent. Because most men here use Bumble/hinge to find companionship, a good friend for a lifetime and to fix them because apparently all of them fell in love with a heartless witch who shattered their heart. And when you tell them that this won't work for you, they say “I am not saying no to something serious, just not ready at the moment but eventually I will be ready”.

I sometimes wonder about the confidence these men have (I am trying to not be rude here but yeah, the right word is “Audacity”), to reach out to a stranger and except them to be give emotional support and the companionship when I still struggle to ask my change back from the auto anna who asked 20rs extra. I really do believe that's it's better that someone openly admit that they are looking for a causal relationship rather than not knowing what they want and expect a girl to come fix them and open their eyes to the whole new world.

Moral of the story- when someone tells you that they want something casual appreciate the honesty and move on. But when they say I am not sure we will talk and go with the flow –“Run Girly”

Brown Girl on a Dating app.......

It's been more than a decade since I thought of dating and getting to know someone, I guess the statement makes you wonder that a women in her 30's is here to talk about re-entering the dating pool? Plot twist I am 25. Yup the last time when I went on a date, met someone and fell in love, I was in 15. Not here to talk about the toxic abusive relationship I walked out of but the funny stories and strange people I encounter as I decided to find love and settle down (because, Hey ! Not everyone is your ex right ?)

I still remember the day I told my friend that I am ready to have a committed relationship little did I know it's been almost a year since the day and I am still surfing through the Internet looking for the one.

As a desi lady it wasn't easy to get on an dating app without the fear of being judged. And it took me 20 days to actually stay on the app without freaking out and deleting my account. My first choice was bumble as the app promoted itself as women centric. When I was reinstalling the app for Nth time I did get a mail quoting “We noticed a suspicious behavior” and wanted to confirm my ID with a second level authentication.

Yup it took me those many attempts to finally build the confidence and courage to talk and get to know strangers online.

The first ever match on bumble was a Doctor from China, he had already put in his insta handle in the prompts so I was able to do a bit of background check and felt safe to swipe right , and guess what we matched!! The guy was above 6 feet ,a doctor and already made plans for our wedding. So yeah we did text talked about common interests, the convo was good I really did saw a potential there. Before I continue the story further I think I should really drop a bit of a introduction here I guess. I am so clumsy that I may trip over air molecules , and I my brain to keyboard connection is bit fizzy and wonky. So yeah, when we said good night and ended the chat for the night I decided to stalk the guy on Instagram and I accidently double tapped on a post that was a year old. (Who even asked these updates from Instagram, I prefer to click on the little heart at the bottom left if I want to like someone’s profile ) So the super embarrassed me freaked out and decided to unmatch the guy on bumble there goes my first ever match.