therapy notes
- explain martin situation (guy off hinge, talk sun-tues, meet @ park, communicate, avatar same night, date cancellation wed, ghost)
- he said i was crazy, rude and kept insulting him, and blew up when he cancelled the date
- he never gave a time for the date until the day of. he also didnt message me the entire day come the day of our date until 6pm, and cancelled it at 6:30pm because “shit got dumped on him” and didnt try to reschedule either
- i told him it will be difficult for us to continue if hes unable to schedule things properly and how it wasnt cool he didnt talk to me the entire day – he took this very personally when all i did was communicate how i felt
- he said i was crazy and whacko because i opened up to him about struggling with mental health he said it was weird i moved to a new city to live alone and come back to visit family and friends due to depression when i couldve just stayed in our hometown
- he lied about what information he told me that day and is spreading around a false narrative about me
- i catfished him & acted like he was in the right so hed spill more information (read screenshot)
my evilness
- i am catfishing him and already plan to get revenge, for a lack of better words. i want to fuck him up.
- i got him banned off hinge already.
- i signed his number up for scientology, insurance, religious outlets, the army, etc. and his work email.
- i had an instance in the past where the same thing happened with someone i considered my favorite person. after a convo where i communicated my feelings (which happened frequently) he told me we wouldn't be friends anymore and cut me off. i proceeded to sign his email up for every newsletter in existence, used a catfish account to confess to his crush that he worked with how he had a creepy obsession with her (and used the name of her pet shrimp to prove i wasn't lying), i confessed to another girl in the friend group that he found her fucking annoying, i signed him up for therapists using psychologytoday and in the little inquiry box i spilled all his dirty laundry to strangers.
- i have a strong urge to get justice and i thought i put this part of myself behind me, as shown when i didn't retaliate against josh, but now that martin did this to me it came back again. i am sick of self-love, taking the high road, and being the better person. i am sick of being the only person who goes down, this time i vow to take someone down with me.
- self love – i know it's good advice. it's fine advice, really. but i already do things for myself and have my own life. i want someone to share it with and using the apps is killing me because everyone is so fucking ugly. i just want to find someone. i want to share my life with someone. i'm so miserable being alone while everyone else around me has these happy go lucky relationships. and i tried getting a pet and it didn't work. fuck fuck fuck.
next: martin –> josh
- martin makes me miss josh
- i messaged anney (read message)
- makes me miss everything before february 15 when josh was good to me and wasn't a piece of shit