Suburban Nature Lover . Squirrel, I cannot feed you, because you are not colorful, like the birds. I will put your favorite food outside by your tree and contrapt a device to make it impossible for you to get the food. . Deer, you might think that because I planted these delicious flowers outside, where you live, that they are for you to eat. But they are for me to look at, and now I have to shoot you. . Snake, you are long and so different in form and behavior than I, that I fear you, and will now hack you to death. . Insect, it goes without saying, but I will say it anyway: it is my job to step on you because I am so much bigger and your existence annoys me. . Plant, you are not what I planted in my garden. I will rip you out by your roots and toss you into the dry heat to die. . The parts of nature that haven’t learned their place, that haven’t learned who’s in charge, I will destroy. This is my house. God gave it to me. You are in the way.