Tuesday was St. Patty’s day, and in preparation for it I made my class watch a bible study video version of who’s St. Patrick He was a slave sent to Ireland, then he escaped, then he went back on his own volition to convert pagans to Christianity, by arguing that his God could save them from famine, and they needed that. I didn’t watch the video before showing it.
Marquis came to class wearing a green, plastic tophat that said
Happy St. Patty’s Day on the front, and Bud Light on the back
We silently laughed so hard about that. Marquis don’t know what that is.
By today, Friday, Marquis’s Aide or One-on-One told him it’s all done
with the hat. Take it off.
Marquis was furious. He tore the hat apart with his nails and teeth
and threw it on the floor. He banged his head off the front of his desk.
We started prompting him to take space, and everyone moved away from him
Thank god he went, and I let him have the daily reward at the end of the day
for turning things around.
In the past, that child has broken the computer monitor 3 times, broken a thick glass window with his head, and bitten the hell out of kids and staff. So that’s why we jumped away from him. He’s also floridly psychotic, all the time. You can interact with him, but it’s only one reality that he’s experiencing and he only uses scripts to communicate (easy to figure out ones- to us).
When they got Marquis into the gym, we heard him shrieking, BIIIITTTCHHHH His aide said, I don’t know if I should go out there, since he’s mad at me, but I said, you’re still the best person with him, and she went.
I didn’t give the daily reward to Martinez, who targeted Ms. Mary all day, again. He threatened to kill her both softly and loudly, and when he got our response, which started patient and got quickly to “enough’s enough,” he shouted, “I don’t care!” He walked by me, gave me the finger, and left, slamming the door as hard as he could. He kept trying to engage her in the abuse cycle. It’s so obvious, and he’s trying to speed it up.
First, say abusive things and insults. He called her a pig. He whispered here and there, “I just don’t like Ms. Mary. I want her out of here!” then making Ms. Mary a card with her name in crayon, and if she accepted it, returning to tear it up and repeat his threats. We have at least 4 adults intercepting and distracting him, trying to help him participate in activities. I kept one eye on him all day. When he’s thinking about how he wants the daily reward, he starts over-doing niceness. Offering people weird things to eat, like some of his carrots at lunch, a half eaten apple, or random papers, he asks for compliments about everything good he does, and I usually give them. “That’s right, those are good manners (please and thank you). But at the end of the day, he didn’t earn it, in my book, or in Ms. Mary’s book.
We have one teammates who’s been extremely absent, playing the good cop, not being there during drama, taking naps somewhere. It’s annoying. But not the most annoying thing a teammate can do. But she’s accusing us of being “negative” and non-therapeutic at points, although I’m not sure if her criticism was directed as us or others I’m not always therapeutic. I have to keep many petty comments to myself. But I directly told Martinez several times, “You do not get the reward because you threatened to kill Ms. Mary several times today, and you said many unkind words to her.” “Well, I just don’t like Ms. Mary,” he said. That’s fine, I said, but that’s why you don’t get the reward. He pounded the wall, accused Ms. Mary of staring at him, shook his fist at her, and spent the rest of the day in the gym. I hope she doesn’t quit because she has a solid core for this type of work, and it’s her next stage of growth.
He’s triggering her, which is further triggering Martinez, the energy alone. His mean words make her want to cry, and remember her ex-husband’s abuse, and I see her shaking a little bit. When Martinez wants his reward and starts stalking me (hanging out by my desk), he’ll say. I’m safe. I’ll be safe. Can I have (all these things)? but I told him, That’s good, that’s good that you’ll be safe. He said, “I won’t hurt Ms. Mary,” I said that’s right, and also because I won’t let you “I won’t hurt her,” Right, and if you try to, I will stop you. He thinks about it. He bites his hand. I stand firm. Safe hands, I say.
I really don’t know where this situation could go next. He’s perseverating her and projecting everything on her. She probably reminds him of someone. someone he definitely did not like, or someone who did not like him. perhaps the stepmom. He was exposed to domestic violence for years. His IQ is around 50. But he knows when someone is laughing at him. And he knows right from wrong. “Don’t hurt Ms. Lisa,” he’ll say, “Or I’ll go to prison?” he smiles for some reason. This is a calming script for him for some reason.
Jermiah tells Martinez to stop bully Ms. Lisa. “Or Jeremiah will punch me?” Martines asks, looking to me.
I don’t think he’ll punch you, although you never know, but we don’t like it. we don’t like you talking to Ms. Mary. I don’t want you to speak to her or about her at all anymore.
I guess only time can tell where this will go. I bet if Mary’s energy shift, Martinez’s will too. He’s sensing her history of being victimized, and he’s relishing the bully’s role. This child is having heart surgery soon. He’s not a strong kid. He’s slow. He laughs maniacally for no reason sometimes. His mood is like the wind. But he sure hates tf outta Mary.